living near the bridge

pretentious salt lick valley
this is what i've used to sustain
but i'm not stabilized anymore

i'm drowning in my own body
trying to keep afloat in the
slowly seeping liquids of my illnesses

it's hard to breathe with holes punched
through my sinus, the size of...but one man's heart
keep blowing

it's becoming unreal to awaken
sitting on edge of the toilet suitable as a metaphor for life
and all i can manage to get out
is a shudder
in response to the pubic hair settling too near for comfort
it's a disgrace

people come to las vegas to die

and although it's been a long, drawn out process
i'm not so sure that it's time to do myself in
just yet

because the juice is too damn good
and i saw a sunset yesterday at the end of my street
that made me realize that
this
was all a dream
and that i'm fine

the pinks and oranges
are still comforting

at least for me